Author Topic: Turtle Smashing  (Read 845 times)

Offline Tuesday

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Turtle Smashing
« on: October 12, 2015, 03:19:13 pm »
I have a problem.  I work with/for a man who yelled at me, threatened my job, and glared at me until I am certain that I feel permanently frightened of him.  However, I don't want to go to work everyday in this state.  Apparently, he believes that I do "not"  instigate trouble, but I seem to be there "to help" when it would be more convenient to have someone on his team who will "walk away" from the troubles.  He gave me 2 examples of how I am living dangerously in terms of general practice and my employment.  1.  He knew a woman who adopted a problem child from her home country, brought her to the U.S. and was murdered by that child 18 years later. 2.  (a lighter example he offered) His family member wanted to stop the car to help a turtle across the road.  When his family returned on the same path, the turtle was indeed smashed on the road. 

I was really shocked when he gave the turtle story, because just that weekend, I had pulled over to assist a snapping turtle across a busy street.  I just "clapped" my hands while another couple blocked the path of oncoming cars with their car. There were 4 of us helping the turtle.  When I told my manager this … he went ballistic.  In summary,  he screamed that this was abnormal behavior and reminded me that I was about to be the smashed turtle. 

So, I don't want to go to work.  I am sick to my stomach about this, but for the life of me, I don't know quite what he is saying, what I am supposed to do help him, or anything.  Any guidance would be most appreciated.  What does this really mean? What is he really saying?   :bigtears:

Offline Dharmakara

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Re: Turtle Smashing
« Reply #1 on: October 13, 2015, 01:56:36 am »
Hi Tuesday and welcome to FreeSangha.

My advice is two-fold: first would be that you find a new job and second would be that you stop trying to "fix" people, as both of these aspects firmly rest in your own hands. This doesn't mean that you shouldn't have compassion or feel empathy for others, but that compassion and empathy require wisdom, where that wisdom would lead you to know that some things are outside of your own control to change.

Offline Tuesday

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Re: Turtle Smashing
« Reply #2 on: October 13, 2015, 01:03:00 pm »
Thank you, Dharmakara.  That is good advice. 

Offline tomatosupu

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Re: Turtle Smashing
« Reply #3 on: October 24, 2015, 08:37:42 pm »
He doesn't respect you. There are certain people I have problems with, like your boss. I would quit too.

Offline Tuesday

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AKA Bystander Apathy
« Reply #4 on: November 11, 2015, 10:35:48 pm »
Last Friday, he was written up for multiple problems (basically bystander apathy).  He never intervened when instructors weren't doing there jobs.  He never intervened when there was any problem.  We lost hundreds of students and he was threatened with being fired.  He resigned without notice!  I am so happy at work now, but I still feel that he was the " snapping turtle I wanted" to help.  Oh well, at least my workplace is peaceful again.  :dharma:

 


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