Author Topic: 3 weeks into meditation course...  (Read 666 times)

Offline Arkena

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3 weeks into meditation course...
« on: October 17, 2018, 02:34:34 pm »
Since starting my meditation course...im on week 3...recently ive been meditating 2 hours a day as recommended...

I do one hour of samatha...following the breath

one hour of metta bhavana...

I feel so transformed by these practices. Things are becoming clearer for me about my emotions like:

Anger,jealousy,hatred,anxiety...none of them will help you in a situation...they will just make you feel worse about the situation...they are the opposite of finding peace in the moment.

Its not all been easy, ive had some rough spots where i was doing something wrong out of meditation and i kind of had a meltdown (autism)...but i realised what i was doing wrong and that it was stressing me and have learnt from it.

Im becoming quite aware of how "strong" my ego is (western definition)...it wants to make me feel 10 feet tall and arrogant but in so doing it disconnects me from being compassionate to my fellow beings. Im guessing under a buddhist definition this ego would be classified as a delusion?

peace

Offline Rasputin

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Re: 3 weeks into meditation course...
« Reply #1 on: November 02, 2018, 03:54:10 pm »
Since starting my meditation course...im on week 3...recently ive been meditating 2 hours a day as recommended...

I do one hour of samatha...following the breath

one hour of metta bhavana...

I feel so transformed by these practices. Things are becoming clearer for me about my emotions like:

Anger,jealousy,hatred,anxiety...none of them will help you in a situation...they will just make you feel worse about the situation...they are the opposite of finding peace in the moment.

Its not all been easy, ive had some rough spots where i was doing something wrong out of meditation and i kind of had a meltdown (autism)...but i realised what i was doing wrong and that it was stressing me and have learnt from it.

Im becoming quite aware of how "strong" my ego is (western definition)...it wants to make me feel 10 feet tall and arrogant but in so doing it disconnects me from being compassionate to my fellow beings. Im guessing under a buddhist definition this ego would be classified as a delusion?

peace

Sounds a little like you’re bragging in this post. I think, with meditation, more is not necessarily better. You practice being “awake” on the cushion so you can be “awake” off of the cushion.

Offline zafrogzen

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Re: 3 weeks into meditation course...
« Reply #2 on: November 03, 2018, 08:32:10 am »
I don’t know. It looks like Arkena is just following instructions.

If I don’t stick to a goal of meditating for a certain time (which has gotten longer with practice), but instead just do it when I’m inspired to, my practice starts to falter very quickly.
My first formal meditation training was with Shunryu Suzuki in the 60's and later with Kobun, Robert Aitken and many other teachers (mainly zen). However, I've spent the most time practicing on my own, which is all I do now. I'm living in a rather isolated area so I miss connecting with other practitioners. Despite my interest in zen I've made an effort to remain secular. You can visit my website at http://www.frogzen.com

Offline Rasputin

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Re: 3 weeks into meditation course...
« Reply #3 on: November 03, 2018, 09:38:41 am »
I don’t know. It looks like Arkena is just following instructions.

If I don’t stick to a goal of meditating for a certain time (which has gotten longer with practice), but instead just do it when I’m inspired to, my practice starts to falter very quickly.

I completely agree with you, it’s important to be disciplined and consistent.

Offline zafrogzen

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Re: 3 weeks into meditation course...
« Reply #4 on: November 04, 2018, 11:02:41 am »
I do agree that crowing about one’s insights does look like bragging.

Being “awake” on and off the cushion is where it’s at – not so easy for me, even after long years of practice.
My first formal meditation training was with Shunryu Suzuki in the 60's and later with Kobun, Robert Aitken and many other teachers (mainly zen). However, I've spent the most time practicing on my own, which is all I do now. I'm living in a rather isolated area so I miss connecting with other practitioners. Despite my interest in zen I've made an effort to remain secular. You can visit my website at http://www.frogzen.com

Offline Rasputin

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Re: 3 weeks into meditation course...
« Reply #5 on: November 04, 2018, 12:33:58 pm »
I do agree that crowing about one’s insights does look like bragging.

Being “awake” on and off the cushion is where it’s at – not so easy for me, even after long years of practice.

I guess that’s why it’s called practice  :socool:

Offline Arkena

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Re: 3 weeks into meditation course...
« Reply #6 on: November 05, 2018, 02:30:35 pm »
Shouldnt we cultivate an atmosphere where we can discuss and exchange insights?
Surely others could benefit from them as well?
 Wouldnt this be an atmosphere conduucive to wisdom?
Is there an unsaid rule on this in buddhist circles?

I find an hour on the cushion can be very productive, given my lack of employment i want to reap what i sow and find meditation quite rewarding, i regard it as my primary spiritual practice now:

The other day i was getting a bout of anxiety (i have anxiety issues) with an accompanying chest pain as well. I focussed and just stopped the anxiety in its tracks...ive never been able to do that before. Perhaps im naive but i hope to master my anxiety issues through meditation. Seems to be a lot quicker than results from seeing my psychologist for the same thing. She was able to get me to stop having full on anxiety attacks but it took months. Ive only been meditating for a few weeks maybe 4-5 now.

Offline Gibbon

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Re: 3 weeks into meditation course...
« Reply #7 on: November 05, 2018, 03:43:15 pm »
I think that you are doing well with this, good job Arkena!  What is most important now is to develop the habit of a regular practice, so that after the end of the course you do not drop it.  But if you happen to drop it, just pick it up again, no worries. 

Offline paracelsus

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Re: 3 weeks into meditation course...
« Reply #8 on: November 07, 2018, 08:20:47 pm »
Shouldnt we cultivate an atmosphere where we can discuss and exchange insights?
Surely others could benefit from them as well?
 Wouldnt this be an atmosphere conduucive to wisdom?
Is there an unsaid rule on this in buddhist circles?

I find an hour on the cushion can be very productive, given my lack of employment i want to reap what i sow and find meditation quite rewarding, i regard it as my primary spiritual practice now:

The other day i was getting a bout of anxiety (i have anxiety issues) with an accompanying chest pain as well. I focussed and just stopped the anxiety in its tracks...ive never been able to do that before. Perhaps im naive but i hope to master my anxiety issues through meditation. Seems to be a lot quicker than results from seeing my psychologist for the same thing. She was able to get me to stop having full on anxiety attacks but it took months. Ive only been meditating for a few weeks maybe 4-5 now.

Yes, most important to feel free to discuss our practice and understanding without being criticised or put down. I think you are right that there is a rule on this and it might be within the precept to avoid harsh, unkind or divisive speech. It would be a major disaster to discourage someone from their Buddhist practice, and have them give up the happy opportunity.
 
I have been taught that the most important thing, among all the other most important things, is to enjoy meditation practice.

Any particular sitting will be what it is. It is better to leave the cushion happy and unstressed than to leave it defeated and miserable. That way you'll want to come back and practice again.

Although there can be a pleasure derived from gritting teeth, sitting through hours of pain, as there is from running a marathon, (so I'm told)  this isn't the purpose of sitting. Happiness and well being will improve, with its ups and downs, as your practice continues if it is correct.

Discipline is necessary though, to keep to the subject or non-subject of a meditation session, and effort is required to build up the mental fitness, so it is worth developing perseverance. 

From what you have said on your posts you are doing the right thing and should remember that there will be good and bad, up and down. The Buddha dharma is a vast subject.

As Gibbon said " ... if you drop your practice, just pick it up again, no worries"

There's every chance that the result of your practice can be just that, no worries.

Metta

 


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