Author Topic: Noticing unpleasant things in myself  (Read 996 times)

Offline Arkena

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Noticing unpleasant things in myself
« on: October 08, 2018, 12:12:58 pm »
So during my samatha meditation (we will move onto vipassana techniques later in the course)
I sometimes notice things about myself deeper in my mind, like the other day i noticed how low my self esteem is of my own wisdom.

I dont hold much regard for my earthly, grounded wisdom to do with life etc.
I dismiss my own wisdom...

I became accutely aware of this which led me to focus on it outside my meditation sessions and to get quite down about things.

How do i handle noticing things deep within me i might prefer not to be aware of?

Offline philboyd

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Re: Noticing unpleasant things in myself
« Reply #1 on: October 09, 2018, 06:51:00 pm »
Simultaneous development of the other seven factors ( you are working on meditation ) of the Noble Eightfold Path will remedy.
Peace

Offline Dairy Lama

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Re: Noticing unpleasant things in myself
« Reply #2 on: October 10, 2018, 01:31:10 am »
How do i handle noticing things deep within me i might prefer not to be aware of?

Do some metta bhavana practice, particularly the first stage.
"My religion is very simple - my religion is ice-cream"

Offline stillpointdancer

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Re: Noticing unpleasant things in myself
« Reply #3 on: October 10, 2018, 02:17:35 am »
So during my samatha meditation (we will move onto vipassana techniques later in the course)
I sometimes notice things about myself deeper in my mind, like the other day i noticed how low my self esteem is of my own wisdom.

I dont hold much regard for my earthly, grounded wisdom to do with life etc.
I dismiss my own wisdom...

I became accutely aware of this which led me to focus on it outside my meditation sessions and to get quite down about things.

How do i handle noticing things deep within me i might prefer not to be aware of?
Be kind and forgiving to yourself. It's the one thing that many find really difficult, especially as they come to understand where they have gone wrong in the past. It's important to say something like, "May I be well, may I be happy" as well as wishing this to others.
“You do not need to leave your room. Remain sitting at your table and listen. Do not even listen, simply wait, be quiet, still and solitary. The world will freely offer itself to you to be unmasked, it has no choice, it will roll in ecstasy at your feet.” Franz Kafka

Offline Chaz

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Re: Noticing unpleasant things in myself
« Reply #4 on: October 10, 2018, 02:36:14 am »
So during my samatha meditation (we will move onto vipassana techniques later in the course)
I sometimes notice things about myself deeper in my mind, like the other day i noticed how low my self esteem is of my own wisdom.
Hi
I dont hold much regard for my earthly, grounded wisdom to do with life etc.
I dismiss my own wisdom...

I became accutely aware of this which led me to focus on it outside my meditation sessions and to get quite down about things.

How do i handle noticing things deep within me i might prefer not to be aware of?

This is a question for your instructor, not us.

Offline zafrogzen

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Re: Noticing unpleasant things in myself
« Reply #5 on: October 13, 2018, 02:32:04 pm »
When one starts meditating and noticing patterns of thought, it becomes clear how most thinking is vain, self-involved and unnecessarily counter-productive. The only solution is to let it go. http://www.frogzen.com/uncategorized/you-can-think-whatever-you-like/
My first formal meditation training was with Shunryu Suzuki in the 60's and later with Kobun, Robert Aitken and many other teachers (mainly zen). However, I've spent the most time practicing on my own, which is all I do now. I'm living in a rather isolated area so I miss connecting with other practitioners. Despite my interest in zen I've made an effort to remain secular. You can visit my website at http://www.frogzen.com

Offline Arkena

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Re: Noticing unpleasant things in myself
« Reply #6 on: October 17, 2018, 02:20:25 pm »
Ty for all your replies, i eventually contacted my teacher and he got back to me within 24 hours i think it was.

Previously he had ignored a question so i didnt know if he would respond or not.

He said metta bhavana practice ...accepting and loving myself would help me...which it has.

Peace

Offline BlackLooter

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Re: Noticing unpleasant things in myself
« Reply #7 on: October 18, 2018, 02:55:27 am »
I noticed that I'm not the strongest person in the world.. And don't have enough willpower to carry on with my life via the route of transmission..which is vampiric in a way..of all the last lords..are of the governors stockings...and in stalkings..which are good in every way,...we have a little bit of karma..and a little bit of dharma..which is the laws of the thing,..but you are everything..so sure is it that you are this..means the whole industry is you!~

I can't let go of these comments..I can't let go of these fears..

I'm afraid I'm born into this genetic disposition and can't change of it by matter of fact..

Kittys come and go..but it's the anti that is most important,...the oracle knows this that of matter of fact..my lover..is Margaret Long..within the taboo range of everything else..that this nihilisitic locomotive can muster..
Freedom reigns over everything!

 


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