Author Topic: Hatred  (Read 1686 times)

thornbush

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Hatred
« on: December 07, 2009, 07:32:42 pm »
"There are these ten ways of subduing hatred. Which ten?

[1] "Thinking, 'He has done me harm. But what should I expect?' one subdues hatred.

[2] "Thinking, 'He is doing me harm. But what should I expect?' one subdues hatred.

[3] "Thinking, 'He is going to do me harm. But what should I expect?' one subdues hatred.

[4] "Thinking, 'He has done harm to people who are dear & pleasing to me. But what should I expect?' one subdues hatred.

[5] "Thinking, 'He is doing harm to people who are dear & pleasing to me. But what should I expect?' one subdues hatred.

[6] "Thinking, 'He is going to do harm to people who are dear & pleasing to me. But what should I expect?' one subdues hatred.

[7] "Thinking, 'He has aided people who are not dear or pleasing to me. But what should I expect?' one subdues hatred.

[8] "Thinking, 'He is aiding people who are not dear or pleasing to me. But what should I expect?' one subdues hatred.

[9] "Thinking, 'He is going to aid people who are not dear or pleasing to me. But what should I expect?' one subdues hatred.

[10] "One does not get worked up over impossibilities.

"These are ten ways of subduing hatred."

What do you think? Does the above sound passive to you?

Offline dhammaseeker51

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Re: Hatred
« Reply #1 on: December 08, 2009, 08:03:24 am »
As with most of the Buddhas teachings its a lot easier to say than to practice.
I've been using Buddhist forum for a long time but it seems to be full of people who really need to use these teachings, a lot of foul language etc on there.
Did you ever get to see Ajahn Brahm in UK?
with metta.

thornbush

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Re: Hatred
« Reply #2 on: December 08, 2009, 09:03:04 am »
Greetings dhammaseeker51,

Nope, I did not meet Ajahn Brahm in UK but in my own country, Malaysia, once when he was giving a Dhamma talk around this time (December) last year. And yes, of course the old saying always applies: 'Easier said than done'. Be well.   

David

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Re: Hatred
« Reply #3 on: December 08, 2009, 09:20:15 am »
What do you think? Does the above sound passive to you?

It's only passive if I mistakenly believe thinking those thoughts means I cannot carry out action.  It is still possible to think such thoughts and and engage in action to prevent or stop someone from hurting me or others.

Offline Monkey Mind

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Re: Hatred
« Reply #4 on: December 08, 2009, 09:35:18 am »
'But what should I expect?' that's a good question, what should I expect?

Offline humanitas

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Re: Hatred
« Reply #5 on: December 08, 2009, 10:16:36 am »
An interesting point that just struck me is that these 10 ways are not to diminish the occurrence of the phenomena (he harmed me, he harms my pleasing loved ones etc) but to diminish the strength of our own reactions.  So the "subduing" of hatred is really a very personal experience and journey.  It's an exercise in reflection and growing our awareness of how strongly we react to impermanent phenomena, and an exercise in weakening by not jumping the gun, but asking, "What should I expect?" as if confirming, "I have this misperception that someone harming or attempting to harming me is a mistake" while in reality it's not a mistake (who decides what a mistake is anyway?) it's just life's inevitability occurring.  So then the question is "what should I expect" as a self-examination.   What SHOULD one expect?  It sounds silly because we all have expectations(pre-meditated resentments) and yet this is such a powerful tool to effectively weaken the common sense we carry through the perceptions of our ego of "This should be xyz because of ME and its occurrence in a different manner is disturbing my comfort"

Just my two cents, very interesting food for thought...
This post was made with 100% recycled karma

Offline Michael_S

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Re: Hatred
« Reply #6 on: December 10, 2009, 07:07:46 am »
Although I am quite new to Buddhist thinking and practice, this sutta sounds very much to me
like the suggested coping technique for facing anger and hostility as outlined in REBT
(Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy). In essence, one examines one's own past responses
to hostility or other difficult situations and learns to apply a rational belief system rather than
a learned dysfunctional one. A link to a PDF condensing REBT is below. It reminds of the list of
possible thoughts about hatred, and our expectations as posted earlier in this topic.

http://www.smartrecovery.org/resources/library/Tools_and_Homework/Quick_Reference/abc_crashcourse.htm

REBT came to be some decades ago when a clinical psychologist used concepts of the Greek Stoics
to formulate a means to alter one's own thinking and responses to fit the real world, rather than our
acquired delusional beliefs. But of course there would also be some major difference between REBT and Buddhism as well.
There are at least some similarities, and that interests me.
Metta to All
Mike

Offline Ron-the-Elder

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Re: Hatred
« Reply #7 on: January 04, 2010, 04:04:23 am »
Quote
When embraced,
the rod of violence
   breeds danger & fear:
Look at people quarreling.
I will tell of how
I experienced
      dismay.
Seeing people floundering
like fish in small puddles,
competing with one another  —
   as I saw this,
   fear came into me.
The world was entirely
   without substance.
All the directions
   were knocked out of line.
Wanting a haven for myself,
I saw nothing that wasn't laid claim to.
Seeing nothing in the end
but competition,
I felt discontent.
         And then I saw
an arrow here,
   so very hard to see,
   embedded in the heart.
Overcome by this arrow
you run in all directions.
But simply on pulling it out
   you don't run,
   you don't sink...

Whatever things are tied down in the world,
you shouldn't be set on them.
Having totally penetrated
   sensual pleasures,
   sensual passions,
you should train for your own
      Unbinding.
— Sn 4.15



The Buddha:]

"Having killed anger
   you sleep in ease.
Having killed anger
   you do not grieve.
The noble ones praise
the slaying of anger
   â€”  with its honeyed crest
   & poison root  —
for having killed it
   you do not grieve."
— SN 1.71


reference:  http://www.accesstoinsight.org/lib/study/nonviolence.html

What Makes an Elder? :
A head of gray hairs doesn't mean one's an elder. Advanced in years, one's called an old fool.
But one in whom there is truth, restraint, rectitude, gentleness,self-control, he's called an elder, his impurities disgorged, enlightened.
-Dhammpada, 19, translated by Thanissaro Bhikkhu.

Offline White Lotus

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Re: Hatred
« Reply #8 on: January 17, 2010, 11:32:24 am »
a hard source of hatred to deal with is passionate love. in a love relationship hatred will often reveal itself. that does not mean that there arnt skillful means for dealing with the root of hatred. (such as the taming of ego).
love, White Lotus. xxx

 


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